Does man plan while God laughs? How life coaching can help you grab life’s opportunities. Blog by Tiffany Barnard4th March 2021
Have you ever sat down and analysed all the different events that have led you to being exactly where you are today? Ralph Waldo Emerson famously said, “Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” Some people believe that our paths are written at birth by the fates, others believe that fate is only found in Shakespeare.
I believe that we are all given choices in life, the proverbial crossroads if you like and I believe that we must be observant enough to recognise these events as the choices we have been given and use our free will to shape our own destiny. Sometimes these events appear with flashing neon lights and you can’t help but realise that this is a choice that will change your life. Other times the indications are far more subtle, and we really have to be on our toes to notice them.
How I came to be a Life Coach is one such story. It is a story that started as an entrepreneur in a third world country, then took me (through no real choice of my own) to Europe where I found myself alone in a country where I knew next to no one, with a company 10,000 km away that was suffering the delayed effects of the 2008 global recession, and two young children.
My brother, who had recently gone through his own trials was staying with me when someone he had met a lifetime ago in another country, in another life, asked if he was interested in working in Mallorca. He went off to investigate and decided to stay.
My parents were living in the Middle East and took the decision to move to France to be with me and their grandkids. I was delighted! Obviously! This meant that I was not going to be alone any longer and I was going to have access to free childcare when I had to travel! Sorted! Brilliant!
So, my Mum and Dad arrived, and we all settled into a new routine. My brother was really happy in Mallorca, and I mentioned that maybe we should all move to Mallorca the following year! That way we would all be together!
They loved the idea but somewhere along the line we decided to move not next year but 3 weeks later! We are a bit mad like that…
Fast forward 6 years to March 13th 2020, when Spain went into its super strict lockdown. I found myself, for the first time in my life, with nothing to do! My kids were home 24/7. I couldn’t run errands for my parents. Everyone was living in pyjamas, so I didn’t even have washing to do! I started to crack. That is until my husband suggested that I explore my lifelong interest in psychology and human behaviour.
I did as he suggested, and I am thankful to him every day because I found my passion. I always thought that it was artistic people who had passion! Not people like me. I wasn’t passionate about anything. I had worked for decades because that’s what you do. I was never passionate about it. Now in life coaching, I have finally understood what it means when people say, do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life!
When I look back at just how I came to be here, I am amazed at all the things that had to happen to bring me to this point. Was it fate? Maybe. Or maybe I was receptive to doing something new in my life and saw the chances as they came along.
Quite often the people who spend their lives complaining about how crap everything is and how they just wish they could do A B or C are actually comfortable in their discontent. This sounds odd, but it’s true. It takes a certain amount of courage to take the steps to change your life. It is often easier to sit still and whinge while all the possibilities and opportunities pass you by. Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.
All I can say is that when I think of what my life might have been, had I not made the choices I did…I shudder! My husband wouldn’t be my husband for a start! We met here in Mallorca!
The idea that life is a series of choices and those choices determine our direction and our destiny have been offered as the secret to success since the early 20th Century with the likes of Napoleon Hill in his best seller “Think and Grow Rich”. The idea that what we choose to do every day has a fundamental effect on the outcome of our life is called “The slight Edge” by Jeff Olson in his book of the same name.
If you are not paying attention to your life, you will miss all the best bits!! Fate brings you opportunities, and free will determines whether or not you take them so make sure you keep your eyes open and remember what Jim Rohn said, “If you don't like where you are move! You are not a tree!”
I look forward to connecting with you!
P.S. If you feel that you have missed out on life's opportunities for whatever reason, reach out. I can help you create the life you can’t wait to wake up to.